Stinky Blanket Interventions and the Ultimate Laundromat


 

Those of you with small children know that getting a chance to wash their blankies/bears/taggies/etc is the mom equivalent to a bank heist in the vein of Ocean’s Eleven. It takes time, planning, patience, and not a small amount of cunning, and sometimes outright lying (“I don’t know where your blankie is honey….!”), and/or manipulation. At times sheer willpower, bribing, threatening, and the occasional middle-of-the-night-grand-theft is required.

It’s not pretty and it’s not easy.

For some strange reason my boys are thumb-suckers (which I’m sure is not genetic at all, I mean it’s not like their mom sucked her’s until 4th grade!). And not only that, they both have the blankie that is a requisite item to fully embrace the entire thumb-sucking-self-soothing experience.

Our 3-year old boy, Jonah, has been likened more than once to Linus in Charlie Brown. The kid carries his rag-tag blanket everywhere. What once was a super cute pattern of lime green polka dots on a bright white background, has now become olive colored splotches against a variegated backdrop of varying tones of browns, tans, some reds, yellows, and oranges. A good portion of the trim has come off and even ‘clean’, it still looks dingy. (Remind me to NEVER buy anything white for my boys again…)

Jonah blankie

Even Superman with footy-jams needs a blankie!

But man! that child loves his blankie, and getting it from him to do the regular laundry is nothing short of a parenting miracle. He will go hours without it but as soon as he notices me putting it in the clothes basket, he immediately determines that it is the most precious possession he owns and will not part with it for the world. No amount of begging, pleading, logical interceding, or threatening will change his mind.

Let’s face it, my kid already has an addiction… to his blanket.

What Jonah doesn’t realize, and doesn’t care about, is how nasty and gross his blanket tends to get. It is drug through all manner of ickiness outside- through leaves, dirt, mud, and (I’m almost sure) dog poop; not to mention the inside hazards- his baby sister’s spit up, meal times, superhero fights, and toy room emergencies. We’ve been potty-training him… so I’ll let you imagine those scenes. Grocery store floors, Chuck-E-Cheese equipment, parks, camp sites- you name it, that poor piece of fabric has seen it all. Add in that boys are just dirty and smelly in general and you’ve got a full-blown Hazmat scene on your hands at times.

Laundering this precious possession is an absolute must.

But washing (i.e. blanketnapping) is not exactly as easy as it sounds. Jonah just doesn’t understand the neccesary ‘evil’ of cleaning his blankie.

Good thing I do. Even if it takes a heist worthy of The Night Fox!

I know that keeping the fabric clean can help him stay healthy and happy. I know that the soap will wash away all the filth and keep it smelling clean and fresh. I know better than him that the short time it takes to wash it thoroughly will, in the end, potentially keep him from getting sick, or at the very least keep him from rubbing unspeakable nastiness all over himself. I know better.

He may not see, smell, or appreciate the filth that he wallows in on a regular basis. He seems to be totally immune to it. I know better, so I will do what I have to keep him safe. Yes, I force my kid to let me wash his blanket. I refuse to let him surround himself with such ickiness all the time.

I imagine for us all, there is some security blanket we hold close. Perhaps too close? Every worldly blanket that we hold near and dear has the high potential to get filthy with human ickiness. In fact, I would argue that any blanket that we’re holding which is human-wrought will always be filthy- no matter what we do to clean it up and make it look new and smell fresh. Too many of us wallow in the assumed safety of such things, without realizing (like Jonah) how disgusting and unhealthy it really can be for us.

What is your security blanket?

What does it look like? How dependent on it are you?

How filthy is it?

When was the last time you let your Father wash it?

How hard are you fighting Him to launder it?

Today I encourage you dear ones to examine what if any, blankies you have that are needing a good wash. Give them to Abba to throw in the heavenly laundromat! Let Him get the Holy Spirit Tide and Jesus bleach and do some good old scrubbing with His Living Water! Unlike my son’s blanket, I assure you, this particular load of laundry will not need another washing…

Better  yet, scrap the earthly blankie altogether and try a God-one out for size. Because in the end, our only safety can come from God. Period. He is our ultimate security blanket.

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One comment on “Stinky Blanket Interventions and the Ultimate Laundromat

  1. It is so easy to think as adults we have given up our blankies when we really have not. Thanks for the advice to give up our blankies for God to clean up.

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